Sunday, January 18, 2009

Old Friends Never Forget

A few months back I wrote about an email I received from Marcy’s first boyfriend, telling me how much he cared for Marcy. This week I received another email, from a good friend of my daughter from 25 years ago, who has been trying to find me for many years (she had only my former married last name and didn’t know I had remarried). She was finally able to get my email. She had heard about Marcy’s car accident years before and through her tears was writing to me. “Some friendships,” she said, “can not be forgotten.” I, too, was very friendly with her mother and somehow, as happens at times, we lost track of each other.

I called my daughter’s friend immediately and we talked for a while. My daughter would have been 42 this year, and it is hard to picture her friend as 42, married and worrying about her child serving in Iraq. She spoke of her mom and when we finished, I anxiously called her. Time melted away, and it was as if we had just spoken the day before, not 20 years ago. It seems she, too, changed her name when she remarried and that is why I could not find her. We plan to get together soon. It is so hard to believe we have lived in the same city all these years and never bumped into each other. What we did discover was that we have mutual friends that we are both friendly with. We believe we’ll have a lot to talk about and catch up on when we meet, and hopefully, I will never lose track of her again as we grow old together.

I can’t wait to bring my friend and her daughter the book I wrote about surviving grief, and show them precious pictures of Marcy, as we laugh at the antics of both Marcy and her daughter in their teens. I’m sure she’ll also share memories and some of her photos.

What happiness it brings to my heart to know that after all this time, Marcy’s friends still bring me joy by staying in touch and remembering her. I was right all along. She will never be forgotten by me, and it is such a comfort to know that her memory will live in the hearts of others as well.

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