Sunday, February 19, 2012

Grief Opportunities

Look for opportunities that will help you on your grief journey. When you are ready (and don’t rush it), try to find an activity to distract your mind from your loss.

It could be something at your child’s school. Perhaps you always wanted to be a teacher, but you were too busy raising a family. Now you have the time. You may want to volunteer to help as an assistant in one of the classes. Schools can always use volunteers.

You may want to seek out a cause. For example, if your child was killed by a drunk driver, you may want to contact MADD or SADD and ask to be a speaker at one of their meetings or conferences.

You may feel like going to a football game, a basketball game or a movie. At a sporting event, you’ll be able to get rid of some bottled up emotions when you scream and shout for the team you are routing for. At the theater, see a funny movie so you can laugh. Laughing out loud is good for you and can calm you down.

If you are the type who likes to shop, go buy yourself a new dress or blouse. If you can think pleasant thoughts about looking pretty, you can improve your mood.

Perhaps you are religious and attending a church service or meditating are good activities and will force you to think of positive thoughts.

Spend time walking or running outside. The fresh air, the sounds of birds and other animals, the beautiful scenery and the good weather could lift your spirits and relieve tension.

Try engaging yourself in more family activities. If you have other children, they will not only be worried about you, but also feel left out. Remember, they too have suffered a loss, and it is hard for them also. By including them in your thoughts and activities, your family can remain close.

By doing any of these activities, you will meet new people and perhaps find in them a great support system to help you move on with your life. You can also contact many organizations that deal with child loss. My new book lists them all for you to peruse.

Whatever you decide to do, don’t do it because you are trying to get over your loss; do it because you are just trying to get through the loss. Everyone who has lost a child knows it is easy to suggest these ideas but it is another thing to do them and be able to help yourself on your road to recovery.

1 comment:

  1. Great advice Sandy, thanks for sharing. It can be so difficult to find opportunity in grief, I am still struggling to find my way after losing my daughter. To this day, I find it so difficult to get out of bed each morning and in order to move away from this feeling of loss, I have found comfort in sites like that provide ways to help me manage my grief. I hope you take a look and let me know what you think.