Sunday, February 15, 2015
Proactive Grieving Part 2
continued from last week. (If you missed last week, please read it first, below today’s blog.)
Where do we start to find peace and turn loss into legacy?
1. We have to make the decision to accept the challenge to survive using the following: identify weaknesses, identify your support, identify goals, create a plan, accept help, and seek tools for the journey.
2. Actively grieve and express your pain. Tell your story.
3. Share your continued struggle with others.
4. Help others who are hurting on their journey. It will help you too.
5. Keep your loved one present in our today…use the present tense.
6. Seek joy, our birthright.
7. Rebuild. Get involved in your journey. Go to TCF meetings. See a counselor or life coach.
8. Rebuild your body: physically , spiritually by eating right and drinking lots of water, spiritually by looking towards God, and mentally by keeping a journal, tracking both good and bad days, and creating a bucket list. Reduce anything that inhibits the healing process (get a massage, cry often, swim, run, walk, sing and dance).
9. Most importantly, create a legacy by writing a book; starting a foundation, organizing a walk, starting a support group, reaching out to others, using your gifts and giving time. Be proactive.
The power in grief is immense. It can destroy us, it can make us sicker than ever, or we can become bigger and better than we have ever been. We can’t change the circumstances of our loved ones leaving us physically but we can transform our lived from the power of that loss. “I have seen so many powerful things people have done for the legacy of loved ones," said Carmody. "Not only can one survive after a significant loss, we can thrive. Surviving is just the beginning. Believe you can."
“Tears are shed when we are born, and they usher us out when we die; the meaning of life is the dance in-between,” he added.
Lee Ann Womach said in her well-known song, “If you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.” You can sit out as long as you need to but eventually you want to dance our child’s life into the future and that’s what will bring joy back into your life.