The 3rd workshop at the TCF conference I want to
mention for this Sunday dealt with the Now Childless bereaved parents. This workshop broke up
into 6 smaller group to discuss the following topics: step-children, widowed or
single, seasoned grievers, newly bereaved, the child’s possessions and
scholarships and estate planning. After each leader discussed their topic within their group, an informational report was given to the entire group.
I did the “scholarships and estate planning.” Because
childless parents have no one to leave anything to, that presents problems for
the bereaved. What will happen to all your money and your possessions? I don’t
claim to know all the details, but I will give you a brief overview of what I
said and what was discussed by the group.
Most bereaved parents want to honor and remember their child
in some way. By doing some of the following, you will find that you will be
able to accomplish this.
We talked about setting up scholarships in your child’s name
for financially strapped students and many parents do that, but the main part
of this discussion was dedicated to trusts
and setting up an endowment fund.
Everyone should at least have a will. If you don’t, your
estate will go to the state and no relatives can claim anything. If you have a
substantial amount of money, meaning over $500,000, you should set up a trust
and be able to leave whatever you want to relatives, friends and
organizations. By having a lawyer help you do this, your estate will not go
through probate, if you have less than $6 million (this can change, but I think
that is what it is now) and you won’t have to pay any taxes. Paying taxes is the biggest reason
trusts are done. Of course, if you are extremely wealthy, anything over the
government limit of $6 million, you will get slammed!
You can also designate who will get what from your estate in
a written trust prepared by your lawyer. The best way to set this up is to
specify “percentages” for each person rather than a set amount of money. You
don’t know when you are going to die and therefore, may not have the same amount
you thought you might at the time you set up your trust. By doing percentage,
it will be based on the total amount of the estate at your death. Your trust can also set up
funds for grandchildren and designate an executor to take care of that money,
if the child is not old enough, until, say age 25, or any age you want.
I did all types of memorials to honor my daughter, but until
I set up an endowment fund for my daughter in her memory, I was not satisfied.
Now I am. The fund is run by a foundation (every state has them) and each year from
my fund, two or three scholarships for a designated amount (there is a limit of using only 5% of the fund) is given to deserving students who fill out forms and write an
essay. I get to read the essays written and comment on which one I like the
most. In some cases I even get to meet the recipients, giving me great
pleasure. All recipients are given information about Marcy so they are aware of
where the money comes from. When the monies grow and are available, I will
eventually give to something like a touring summer drama camp, something Marcy
was involved in and loved. This is all written in the fund papers I filled out and will be carried out in perpetuity.
The money in the fund is invested, and by doing so, will
always be there for others to benefit. I do pay a very small amount of money
per quarter for that service. I also get a quarterly statement telling me how
the funds are doing in the market. I have designated in my trust that half of what I have
will go to Marcy’s endowment fund to help others when I am gone. It is a great
feeling knowing everything will be taken care of.
For any additional information, see your lawyer. They will
also probably know how to get in touch with the people who run these endowment
funds in the state you live.
