Upsetting Bereaved Parents - Part 2 of 3

For Part 2 (read Part 1 from last week), here are two lists from parents who have taken their grief and expressed what they have experienced that upsets them the most.

One parent:
1. My child’s death will never go away…I cannot run away from this…life will always be different. 2. The inability of others to even imagine the depths of my grief.
3. Being told my child’s death is “God’s will.”
4. The future seems so uncertain and grey.
5. The sense of finality to the family tree because my only child has died.
6. The bitter sweetness of my niece having a baby and knowing my child never will.
7. Being deserted or ignored by others.
8. Others presuming “I am over it.”
9. Loneliness because of my child’s death.
10. The world just goes on and on and I have lost my child.

And another parent:
1. You should feel normal and happy after 14 years. Quit using his death for people to feel sorry for you.
2. I don’t find joy in things other people expect to be happy about (material, travel, parties, small talk).
3. I hate to put on a mask and pretend to be happy.
4. People don’t understand that I will never be the same person.
5. Being with a group of women who constantly share pictures and cute stories about their children and grandchildren.
6. People saying I should have realized my son’s job was dangerous and should be prepared for the worse.
7. Others saying I should be grateful for the things I have, even after my child’s death.
8. Hearing the phrase: “It was God’s will.”
9. Hearing the phrase: “Your son is in a better place.”
10. People, especially family stop talking about my child.