Sunday, April 10, 2011

Upsetting Bereaved Parents Part 3

Part 3 in a 3-part series of upsetting things for bereaved parents to experience after the death of their child includes some additional thoughts that were discussed. There are some very similar ones to what all bereaved parents voice, but all of these parents have come up with some ideas that the others have not or just expressed them differently.

1. Hearing people laugh and feeling like you will never feel such joy again.
2. If you shed a few tears when someone asks about your child, they immediately change the subject not allowing you to experience and feel the moment.
3. Your dreams of future times with your child and any grandchildren—all gone.
4. No one asking about your child on Mother’s Day or any other major holiday.
5. Hearing others say, “Oh, I know how you feel; I lost my dog.”
6. Being told I need to get over it.
7. Seeing friend’s children graduating, getting married, having children.
8. Co-workers complaining because their child hasn’t called in a week and knowing my child will never call again.
9. People saying “now you don’t have to worry about them anymore.”
10. Missing being a family and never seeing your child experience life.
11. Dreaming about your child and waking up to disappointment it was not real.
12. Special anniversary dates: birthdays, anniversaries.
13. The awareness that this is not a bad dream; this really happened.
14. The feeling of abandonment
15. Losing best friends who can’t deal with us because they think we have changed.

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