Sunday, September 2, 2012

Grief Has Changed Me

Grief is defined as “intense mourning.” I think of grief as a lifetime journey. Your child is gone; there is nothing you can do to bring him/her back. So, for the rest of your life, you grieve for that child; you grieve the fact that you’ll never see them again, never share a moment together again or be able to hug them close. The pain at first is indescribable and unbearable. With time, love, patience from others, and perhaps counseling and therapy, the pain will ease but it will never go away. Don’t expect it to. Your heart has been ripped in two and a part of it torn from you, never to be normal again. Even when you find your new normal, the grief will be buried deep down, not visible for all to see. You alone will know it is there. You will always miss your child, love them and mourn for what might have been.

Grief has changed me:

…It has made me more conscious and empathetic of others and their problems.

…It has empowered me to do things that before my daughter’s death I wouldn’t even consider doing

…It has taught me to stand up for what I believe in and help others do the same.

…It has forced me to change my goals in life.

…It has shown me not to be afraid of crying when appropriate because I know grief is my constant companion.

…It has given me new priorities in life.

…It has made me brutally honest with everyone and everything that I now see from a different point of view.

…It has made me acknowledge that everything that happens in this world has a reason. We may not know what that reason is immediately, but eventually we will find out.

…It has striped me of everything I was before my daughter’s death and led me to a new phase of my life.

Perhaps grief is the price you pay for loving someone with every fiber of your being.